Comparisons, expectations, and sad red roses
It’s supposedly a day of romance, and celebration of love for one’s significant other (or who you hope will be your SO), yet from where I sit Valentine’s Day seems to be more about quiet desperation and decidedly sad looking roses. When I say desperation I mean many things- will I receive a card, will I receive flowers and will they be as big a bouquet as the next person’s; will I measure up to what is being splashed all over social media, about “if he/she really loves you, he/she will… (wine, dine, shower with candles and rose petals)…” I am writing from a female perspective, but even if men may have slightly different items on their wish list, the expectation is still there.
Humour me for a moment- see how well you can carry out the following instruction: be spontaneous! Come on, I’m telling you to be spontaneous, right this minute! Smile spontaneously, for the next minute. Be natural!
Not so easy, is it? Kind of extracts the joy out of the moment, doesn’t it! Did you spot the expectation? The comparison was not stated as such, but it tends to easily follow, even if just mentally- You used to…. Why don’t you…anymore? Why can’t you be/do/give what that person’s partner does ? Look it’s right here on Facebook! (twitter.. instagram.. around the office water cooler..)
Don’t get me wrong; I’m all for love and romance! The spontaneous kind is just way more enjoyable than the on demand, on cue, expectation/comparison/stressed out version we encounter every year on 14 February!